Photography: Austin Chadderdon — Richard and Rosalene Heil are recognized by World Marriage Encounter as the longest married couple in Iowa. Since their marriage in 1948, the Heil family have spent most of their time on the family farm in Haverhill.
Soon after the meeting, Richard Heil and Rosalene Neuroth had their first date in the Forest Park Ballroom, a popular local ballroom in Marshalltown. Seventy-three years later, they were recognized as the longest married couple in Iowa by the global marriage encounter.
"We dance, we dance, we dance," she said.
In 1947, they probably completed two of her favorites in Eddy Arnold's "What is Life Without Love" or Hank Williams's "Move It On Over". Step dance.
They were tight-lipped about the first date, but Richard said he was too happy to be nervous, and everything went well—it must be so. It was the first of countless nights and dances spanning 8 decades and 14 presidents. By then, Frank Sinatra was very busy, and one could imagine that they were dancing very close to the "If I Steal A Kiss" when they made the last call in the ballroom.
Photo taken by Arthur Rothstein for the Farm Security Administration: February 1940, the local popular ballroom in the Forest Park Ballroom, where Richard and Rosalind their first date in 1947. The banquet hall was burned down in 1977 and replaced by the car dealer Ken Wise. The dealer subsequently sold it to Dave Wright in 2017 and recently to Carl Chevrolet.
Richard didn't steal a kiss that night-he came later. Rosalyn blushed and said that this was the most memorable moment before they got married.
"A neighbor drove and we rode home and sat in the back seat of the car," she paused, then laughed. "We kissed all the way home."
She even went home on time-which may have left a deep impression on Rosalene's parents and gained support when they announced their plans to get married. However, Richard said that he was not intimidated by her father, and Rosalyn did not think they were surprised. They were very good together, and early marriage was the norm at that time.
"I fell in love with her the first time I saw her," Richard said.
He didn't remember what she was wearing, although Rosalyn interrupted when asked, "Tell me because I want to know," making them both laugh. He also couldn't remember where they were, when they were in the day, or what happened in the world-it was just love at first sight.
Photo provided — Photo from the American T-Ford Club: In 1947, Rosalene Heil (then Neuroth) first spotted her 73-year-old husband outside Dixie Barbeque at 8 South 1st Avenue in Marshalltown. The address is now a parking lot west of Zenos.
"She is just beautiful. It's that simple," he said.
Rosalyn imitated her husband and confirmed her first impression of Richard: he was very attractive.
"He is tall, dark, and handsome," she said. "This is what I like about him."
Rosalyn remembers that it was spring, and she found him for the first time in downtown Marshalltown.
"I think I just saw him on the sidewalk in front of Dixie Barbeque," she said.
They are not set up by friends, helpful aunts, or church elders. They did not meet at the carnival, nor did they reach out for the same black cashmere gloves during the last-minute Christmas shopping at Bloomingdale's, or in a tennis doubles match, or in the restaurant where Richard was building the cabin. Cakes. They didn't have the competing bookstores that eventually brought them together.
This was a simple accidental encounter in March 1947, which led to a 73-year marriage with 7 children, 17 grandchildren and 10 great-grandchildren.
Both Rosalene and Richard grew up on the farm, which makes it easier for their lives and habits to merge. Richard said that transitioning from a 21-year-old single to a married life is not challenging—it's better.
"We love each other and God is with us. We just hit it off," he said.
They established their first home in St. Anthony on Richard’s parents’ family farm. As a wedding gift, Richard's father gave them a team of horses to drive equipment that could make a living.
Through all the advances in medicine, space exploration, technology and pop culture-in Richard's memory, wedding gifts are the most eye-catching. Training horses is a arduous task, and he wondered why as tractors became more and more accessible, his father gave them to him in the first place. However, he continued to ride for a while before turning to his first tractor, which was a 1949 VAC 35 horsepower tractor.
Their child, Jeff, started working on the farm with his father in 1976. Richard gradually withdrew from the early 1990s, but did not leave the farm until autumn. The family farm is now operated by an all-satellite 500-horsepower tractor, but Jeff still owns his father's first 1949 VAC tractor to this day.
They lived a traditional Midwestern life, Richard worked on the land, and Rosalyn took care of the home. He is very satisfied with the new menu and also likes the meals she cooks. Rosalene said that she never needed Richard to make a "dear" list because he always knew what to do and would take care of it.
"We just did things that came naturally," Rosalyn said.
Love, marriage and the next natural step, children. They have seven children, a total of 18 years apart-three boys and four girls. Their family grew rapidly and continued to grow to a total of 27 grandchildren and great-grandchildren.
"Of course there are challenges," Richard said. "We are just trying to teach them to be good Christians together and how to support their families like Christ did."
Richard said that in today's society, young people have certain advantages, but he feels that he and Rosalyn are more likely to build up financially when they are young.
They got married when America was approaching a decade of prosperity. The Second World War is over, and the food rations that followed are also over. The economy grew by 37% in the 1950s. Inflation is extremely low, domestic oil prices are low, social security is expanded, and the interstate highway system is developed.
From 1947, when they first met, to two years after the birth of their last child in 1969, the United States achieved 7 of the country's 12 budget surpluses since 1940—the last time was in 2001.
Their generation grew up in the Great Depression, a decade of high unemployment and World War II armament production led to the rationing of consumer goods.
By the 1950s, Americans’ spending power at the end of the decade had increased by 30% from the beginning, and the economy turned to credit consumerism. In 1950, Diners' Club, Inc. introduced the first credit card, which changed the consumption habits of Americans.
This brave new world full of credit and luxury spending has not affected the habits of Richard and Rosalind. They did not get a new enlightening credit card. Their method is that if you don't have cash, you won't spend money.
Heils did benefit from some of the opportunities that made the 1950s prosper. The Geographical Indications Act helps them carry out agricultural work through guidance and financial support. Because of Richard's status as a veteran, he has other government benefits that can help them grow up with the family.
Richard enlisted in the army in 1945 and joined the paratroopers in Columbus, Georgia. During his training, the war ended and the demand for paratroopers decreased.
He was stationed in Okinawa for a year and made several jumps, but mainly for peacekeeping missions after Japan surrendered. Richard said that jumping off the plane was full of excitement and fear.
"It's a very easy life, there's nothing to do. I enjoy this freedom. I have my own jeep for a while and I can travel as I want. Gas is free. I often go to the sea myself, but I just float there. To kill time," he said.
Man, woman and god
When asked what they valued each other most or what their spouse taught them, Rosalyn and Richard both turned the question back to God and their beliefs.
He said: "I think the most important thing is our love for God and following Jesus as we do." "She taught me a lot about how to grow in faith."
Rosalene is happy that she doesn't have to take her husband out on Sunday morning. Since they are both Catholics, they are on the same page.
"I don't have to invite him to church. He is ready to go anytime," she said.
Over the years, she had to ask him to do things, such as tidy up anything he might have left around the house.
They also have different views on his fashion. She often asked, or suggested that he change his clothes, which sometimes caused Richard to run around the house without clothes-which made Rosalene smile the happiest.
Rosalyn and Richard said that there is no trick or secret to a long-term marriage. Rosalene believes that more and more people choose to divorce because marriage is not what they think. This is an arduous task that requires sacrifice and selflessness.
"It's about listening to each other, understanding each other's needs and enjoying life," she said.
Freedom, family, turmoil, and the power of flowers
The couple was not cut off or unaware of the changes and challenges in society during their 73 years of living together, but they were isolated and focused on simple rural family life. They made a commitment to their marriage, and it seems that their chances of success are close to 100%. Never considered another option.
"We learned to make decisions together, not ourselves... and how to give and receive," Richard said.
Challenges will arise, and they face uncertainty. They will rely on their commitment to solve this problem together. At major historical moments such as the Cuban Missile Crisis or the surge of US troops in Vietnam, they rely on each other's faith. They continue to advance in accordance with the patterns that formed their lives.
"We are worried about what is happening, but we are helpless and can't do anything about it," he said. "It makes us pray more for the needs of the country, and we keep it together through Jesus Christ."
When the world and countries change, Richard spends most of his time in the fields. He has a radio in the tractor, but the signals coming from it often make people feel far away from home. Compared with his work and family, they are just background noise.
"Because I am busy farming, I don't have much time to worry too much," he said.
Rosalene’s answers to many questions about historical events or the bucket list items she crossed out are similar—she is committed to her role as a mother and wife. "Where were you at the time?" Moments like Kennedy's assassination would not make them think.
"My wife and children are in Marshalltown, and I work from home," Richard said.
Their son Jeff recalled the painting and jumped in to paint.
"I'm in kindergarten. I'm going home from school and you are watching your soap opera. It flashed on TV and it was breaking news," he said. "And you are still watching the same old soap opera today."
The soap opera is "as the world turns". Ten minutes after the episode on November 22, 1963, the Hughes were discussing their Thanksgiving plan when Walter Cronkite stepped in to report the assassination. The show was performed live, and the actors were told what happened after the filming ended.
"As the World Turns" premiered in 1954. It has been the highest-rated soap opera during the day for 20 consecutive years, and has won 43 daytime Emmys. They are watching the replay now because it was cancelled in 2010. The show was the first to premiere at 30 minutes. Starting from the previous 15-minute format, it was the first 1-hour CBS soap opera in 1975.
Series star Helen Wagner (Helen Wagner) has participated in the show for 54 years and is the longest-time actor. The show features Daytime TV’s first publicly gay character and the first kiss between two men.
The United States introduced postal codes in the same year that Kennedy was killed—50120 was Heils' first. They have just moved from Richard’s family farm to Rosalind’s grandparents’ farm in Haverhill. With Jeff inheriting this legacy, the Haier family is still cultivating the land.
Jeff said that the 1960s affected the family. His brother participated in the counter-cultural movement, which brought a lot of turbulence and challenges to the country in the late 1960s. Richard and Rosalyn also felt this way at home.
His parents remained silent about this-they tried to raise their children in a conservative environment-but in that era, everything fell apart. They are exploring how to deal with the huge differences between the 1940s and 1950s and the new reality.
By the 1980s, they had an empty nest and gained some freedom. They did not explore crazy new hobbies or make drastic changes. They started to read more.
Jeff said they learned a lot from the turbulent times of the late 1960s and early 1970s. Both Richard and Rosalind come from a big family. The rural cultural traditions they are familiar with have changed, and they have also changed.
They have to adapt to their children, freedom, rebellion, and vigorous sports. Especially at that time, Richard dug deep into his beliefs because of the violent nature of what was happening around him.
"I think it's too far away, too crazy," he said. "I have nothing to do except pray."
Jeff said that his father understood what was happening, gained insight, and used it to shape his role as a grandparent.
Jeff said: "This forces people to be more interested in observing children and what is happening." "After that, they played an important role in their grandchildren. I think they, as elderly people, have learned that they need to participate and help them. Children instruct their own children."
Rosalene said that compared with the factors surrounding her own marriage, the situation of their children at the time of their marriage was different.
"We may try to tell them what we think is the best way, but that doesn't mean they always do it," she said. "They went their own way, and we accepted it."
The longest married couple in Iowa
Life on the farm keeps them away from home for almost 40 years. The couple did not take their first commercial flight until 1988, when they went to Hawaii.
"We are busy taking care of the children," Rosalyn said. "We just did what we had to do."
The couple left the farmhouse and moved to Marshalltown in 1998. When their children grew up, they gained some freedom to travel. They spent some time in the winter in Arizona, but they still found time to watch baseball, track and football games on the sidelines.
Richard and Rosalyn were nominated by Sue and John Fink for the longest married couple award in Iowa. They worked for global marriage encounters and went to church with Heils. They provide weekend experiences for couples who teach communication skills.
During Sunday Mass in St. Henry's Catholic Church on November 14, Heils received a certificate of recognition.
"They are very family oriented. Every time we are in church, we will see them there," Sufink said. "If other family members are there, they will also sit with them."
In the past nine years of the Global Marriage Encounter Project, there have been thousands of nominations. Regardless of religious beliefs, all couples can be nominated, and the average length of marriage for national winners is 81 years. State winners are considered members of the alumni association and can compete for the national championship title every year.
In a few years, Richard and Rosalene may become the longest married couple in the United States. Until then, they will continue to dance, dancing and dancing as they did when they first dated 74 years ago. Richard described his time in the ocean of Okinawa as "floating here to kill time." In this life, what better way to kill time than with the person he fell in love with at first sight?
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